Exemplary College Application

I am the most interesting person in the world. Dos Equis used me for their commercials. Once I challenged my reflection to a staring competition, on the third day I won. I once swam across the English channel lengthwise. I am immune to all diseases. Pharaohs in Egypt bow down when I walk into a room. People who dare to have me as an enemy still use me as an emergency contact. When I make food there is no need for a timer, I tell the food when its done. When sheep cant sleep they count me. When I get in a car its already warm no matter what. I wear jean everything. Once I escaped from Alcatraz I was proven guilty of being innocent. I have never filled up on chips. In the morning my cereal never gets soggy, it stays crisp just waiting for me. Once I taught my German Shepard to bark in Spanish. I live vicariously through myself.  Once I picked my nose and actually struck gold, I never make small talk about the weather even in a hurricane. When I go to the Louvre in France I am encouraged to touch the art. My shirts never wrinkle. Once I forgot to put postage on my mail, it still got there. Sharks have a week dedicated to me. I Once built a town out of Lego when i was a child, its now known as New York. Once I tried to get into a bullfight but the bull refused. Dicing onions doesn't make me cry. The Mayans chiseled my birthday into their calender. The hedge maze in my garden is responsible for more missing persons than the Bermuda Triangle. I am the most interesting man in the world.